next of kin

After having seen dirty dancing once, and road house a couple times i wondered to myself what ever happened to patrick swayze? Well after i saw this movie i wondered no longer. This turd also stars ben stiller, liam nesson and adam baldwin. aka animal mother aka Jayne. They were good but swayze and hellen hunt (the wife) were terrible. usually i like one sterotype vs another type of movies, but rednecks vs the cosa nostra was too much. i mean talk about grasping at straws. why?

2 out of 5 taco sauce packets.

falling down

falling down was a great movie when i was a kid. This guy did all the stuff that i wanted to do. Now watching it as an adult, its apperent to me that the guy is shit house crazy, and he slowly lost his shit over the course of the day. As a kid it seemed like a real big shift into craziness. Now i can see he was crazy in the start. I used to root for michael duglas as a kid but now i sympothize with the burger joint employees dealing with crazy assholes taking out their shit on us. but i degress robert duvall is great in this movie, as is micheal duglas.


3.5 out of 5 taco sauce packets

Danger: Diabolik

This is the movie that the beastie boys ripped off for the video of body movin. The movie is pretty sweet. alot of cool special effects and car chases and wall climbing, and hot itialian chicks in skimpy 60's clothes. They guy steals anything that moves. The main character is a bad guy and that was pretty original for back then. The plot moves briskly, the cinimatography is really cool and the set design is top notch.

Its kind of a bad guy version of james bond in italy.

3.5 out of 5 taco sauce packets

True Grit

John wayne has never held that much intrest to me, and after watching this i can understand why. ok so he is the duke. Ill give him that but in this sequel to rooster cogburn its just kinda ok. Nothing special. except for co stars denis hopper and robert duvall. it was interesting to see both of them so young. Wayne is a officer of the peace that some girl hires to kill the man that killed her father.

glen cambel also co-stars. he' ok.

two packets of tacosauce.

it happened at the worlds fair

elvis, elvis, elvis, what a wierd movie, he hangs out with little kids, beats up guys that catch his partner cheating at cards. then goes up the space needle and the seatle monorail. creepy. and sings some wierd ass songs after trying to get some hot chick to make out with him, narowly avioding the business end of her dads shotgun.

.5 of a taco sauce packet

Stargate

Damn i remeber liking this game, beer and great pizza didn't even make this turd shine. Kurt russel is bland as hell in this. Kurt usually Pwns but WTF the one glimmer of cool was the wink before he shot the guy point blank near the end. OK but not great.

2 out of 5 taco sauce packets.

who's the man

wow what a great/ terible movie. dr. dre ed lover, and everyone in east coast rap circa 1991. This movie is a waste of time excpet for dennis leary as the police captian. He fuckin pwnes the screen.

2 out 5 donuts for ed lover, none for dr. dre.

dead like me season 2

i loved season 1 this show was great. But season two wasn't quite the same. It was good, but not great. Also kinda bittersweet because i knew it was canceled. which made me sad because i really like the show over all.

3 out of 5 tacosauce packets

Gigantour

Anthrax fucking killed it. They were great as was megadeth. They always rule. LOA was awesome but in a crowd of hundreds its kinda wierd to be one of five cheering. towards the end people were actually snickering at me for liking them. well fuck you, you white-hat frat boy cum dumpsters. Fear factory fucking rule as usual to. Nevermore took a couple songs to get it together but after they did they were awesome.

Goldeneye

Goldeneye has it all. Action, acting, decent plot, hot chicks, expolsions, fast cars, lasers...

This movie is fucking spectacular. and one of the few great licensed video games too..

4.5 tacosauce packets out of five.

and Baromir is a bad guy too. which i didn't know.

I mean there is not Bad bond movie.
They always are ok, but this one Pwns.

the Transporter and Transporter 2.

Goddamm i love Luc Besson. This guy rules. So why does transporter 2 suck so bad? and transporter 1 rule? Well i think its because they tried too hard on 2. One was an action movie that didn't need a sequel. How many Besson movies have a sequel? The taxi series... ever seen any of them? me either cuz they were never released in the states... but you dont see nikita 2. There is a reason for that. Transporter one fucking rules. one of the best opening sequences this side of james bond movies, and pretty sweet fight scenes too.

This is what i miss in Transporter 2. Sweet car? a shitty blinged out audi? bleech. that's not the super-pimp black bmw from the first one. i dont buy it frank wouldn't drive that shitty thing. the Lamberghini at the end dope! but the SFX with the plane at the end suck balls. and whats up with the bad guy fighting in a kendo costume at the begining but not fighting kendo style? and why does he hardly put up any fight at the end? with all his sweet fighting? i dunno. my next complaint is that all the "hot chicks" in this movie look like paris hilton clones. Tall skinny with a tight little ass and small tits. they were fit dont get me wrong but how about a little variety? Too many skinny chicks, ugly blingy car, and sketchy SFX at the end not great a carchases and an lack luster opening all made me very disapointed in Transporter 2. But the good news is, similar to the matrix movies, the sequel makes you appriciate the original.

transporter:

Four out of Five tacobell sauce packets

Transporter 2:

two out of five tacobell sauce packets.

Career Oportunities

"Career opportunities are the ones that never knock
Every job they offer you is to keep you out the dock
Career opportunity, the ones that never knock"

hmm whatever happened to that guy anyway? Well after he played brett in pulp fiction "look at the big brain on brett" not much. but this movie is still a slice of life from back when there was only one target in vancouver and it was next to lamonts.. word. so the movie is kinda crappy but i remeber it being so rad. stuck in a target to play with all the cool shit with a MEGA-HOT chick. The fact that john hughes wrote it doesn't really help it much. hmmm. it is fun but not great.


2 tacobell sauce packets

Condorman

so all disney movie suck you say? not this one. Condorman rules. The guy is a comic book creator that gets talked into being a spy, to help a russian KGB agent defect. super 70's plot. super 70's special effects and super 70's cheese ball thirty percent drunk acting. oh yeah this one rules.

4 out of five tacobell sauce packets

Sir Mix-A-Lot: Macanomics

This video was fan-tastic. The video for Posse on Broadway was worth the price alone. With the added bonuses of Beepers, My Hoopty, Baby got Back and my personal favorite Swap meet louie. little mary bong got it going on.

4 out of 5 taco sauce packets.

This place has a sign hangin' over the urinal that says, "Don't eat the big white mint"

Yes, Yes, Yes! Roadhouse for those of you who haven't seen it is one of the great movies of the 80's. Patrick Swayze is top notch as a mullet wielding, degree from nyu in philosophy holding, throat stealing, Bouncer. Yes thats right bouncer. With the chick from Cocktail, Sam Elliot, and Jeff Healey they show that you dont have to be a good actor to make a kick ass movie.

5 out 5 Tacobell Sauce Packets.

New Place Same Taco Smell

Since I decided that friendster sucks, i moved the SLBOF to a new server. The old one was joefrazier.blogs.friendster.com